Do I Have To Put On Airs?

as i was posting and commenting on facebook, i was reminded of an anecdote a grad school professor once gave about him visiting in the home of a couple. he said that he was afraid to touch anything. his host was so very proper, well dressed, everything was so ordered and there were several antiques. well, i can’t recall all the particulars of the story, only that the prof was afraid to let his hair down, so to speak, and that he felt like a stuffed animal.

wondering what it would be like if it had been me in the professor’s stead. well, i’ve been there too and didn’t like it. the ice was broken one night when in Okinawa my CO, a very dignified colonel, invited me along with some other officers over for Thanksgiving dinner. oh man, i showed up too early. got to the door, his wife said he was running an errand and in a jovial manner proceeded to kiss my balding head, grabbed me by the arm and put me to work.

to say i was nervous was an understatement but, long story short, it turned out to be a fun evening with all enjoying the feast and relaxing atmosphere. here was my CO, a no nonsense hard corps Marine officer who expected the best out of his staff in a laid back manner philosophy of work hard, play hard.

oh yes i’ve been in the presence of very high ranking officers and dignified civilian dignitaries in some very uppity functions and i can say for sure that some of them went home wondering who the heck that guy was, while others went home disarmed of their stiffness by yours truly.
well now i can pretty much size up a person and i tell you that if invited to some folks homes at this stage of life, it would be thanks but no thanks. and if i were invited to a full dress formal affair, well i might attend but i wouldn’t hesitate to lean back and get comfy on the couch and pull out my phone for a selfie with the VIP host in the background or whatever to record the affair in all its glory.

here’s to a well earned retirement where this old man can snob his nose and say, thanks but no thanks.

~ Fawkham Hall.


© Feb. 2018 Bob Haines